Tuesday, November 14, 2006
"I believe if time passes. ..everything turns into beauty, if the rain stops, tears clean the scars of memory away ... everything starts wearing fresh colours ... every sound begins playing a heartfelt melody ..jealousy embellishes a page of epic, desire is embracing a dream, but my mind is still in chaos and..." - Say Anything
time is changing every1's life. juz like ppl taking o & a-lvl. they r undergoing one of their major landmarks in their life. but wad abt mine? had i grow up? deserved to be a senior? life seems stagnant. mayb a turning pt is round the corner.
today-did practical, went benjamin's place eat then back for boring lecture. think the lecturer dun like me. kept aiming at me. cos i was listening to earpiece. zhiyong was listening 0so, juz tat sound is coming frm near him. but lecturer shoot me...mayb cos mine using ben's ipod one, white. zhiyong's black. learned something. black n white, good n evil. of cos choose evil. bad guys live longer. next time i wanna be a bastard.
after lecture went back home. took 154 home with chun seng n jian bing. in d end went jp play pool. learned some basics. after the game then came my worst unlucky super suay thing. oni ppl who use boon lay interchange often will understand tis. i went to buy concession, while praying my bus wun come. but there was a worker down there duno applying wad...took so long...my heart pumping fast. once my turn finish, i rushed to my bus area. then faraway saw my bus shadow. think is mine, not yet confirm...so ran like hell, yet in d end REALLY MY BUS. worst is it gone liao. then i saw 30 queue, like centipede sia. dun even think later bus come i can board anot. so thinking i still hav abit of luck left, i immediately made a C route for 178. yet halfway 178 flew past me frm behind. then i saw my 4x100 run again. normal day i surely can catch up. but wrong estimation sia. didnt got the time for my lagging brain to process, forgeting abt my heavy bag n laptop plus the golden period where there is alot of human walls...in d end i suddenly 崩溃... managed to think of 79, but then this time god is better to me. he didnt even give me time to run. so in d end surrendered, decided went back to take 30. but god is smart again. so i laugh at myself. y is there a foolish guy who ran like mad for nothing. yet i am back to square, to the bus queue where i missed at first. A lesson learned again, once u hav chose it, dun change cos u will regret it. mayb tat will apply to my love life. tat is "in future" n "subjected to changes".
of cos, for any1 who shared the same experience "unfortunately", will be bad-tempered AGAIN. went back home whoever provoked me will be as if touching popcupine. my mom is the first victim. but after some cooling down from the shower, became milder liao. yet duno y got war suddenly broke out. btw i remain as swiss thruout. cos duno y ppl fightning war still got ppl extra go in n hav a bite too. in d end became another war. so after some screaming n shouting which hurt my ears n emotionally, i cant really had a peaceful meal.
i can cheer ppl up. yet i am useless in comforting myself. had a emo chat with stan.
can i write a poem? or a song?
if my love is meant to be a stranger
should my enemy be wearing familiar mask?
are we doing charity out of sympathy
or taking pity of ourselves?
will a rose still smell nice
even it's name been change to rafflesia?
does we like cheating ourselves
from the fact that blueberry iced is purple?
why are people benting on becoming heroes
when heroes are extincting?
due to his nothing-to-lose,
a beggar is refrained from gamble.
Mother, mysterious forest n thirsty desert.
when will u embrace me with ur warmth of sunshine
for me to photosynthesis
when are u hurrying me to my dream with ur hands of wind
power of green, a bag of seedlings
when will it releases itself
for the freedom i longed for
up high into the sky
to protect others with my shady arms.
reflected at 10:26:00 PM
