Monday, June 01, 2009
it's JUNe...hot summer
my previous entry was...somewhr in march
yeah, been MIA for quite awhile
alot of things happened in juz these few mths
inevitably, the changes tat fate had brought upon me
training period tasted Bitter
from simulator to actual is such a transverse
there are 2 instructors in charge of training us
say wo A and wo L
wo A say i'm not up to the job
"dey!!! some can. some cannot."
(based on his many yrs of instructing)
on the other hand, wo L say i'm ok...
this goes the same to the captains
T say i very jialat...L say i'm zai
at tat point of time, i felt my mind spin much
faster than the earth rotates liao...
esp gt one lesson where inside the simulator
wo A was on my left ask me whole hell of qns while shaking head
wo L was on my right nodding to my ans and kept prompting "next"
the scenario was like angel playing tug of war with devil
and i'm exactly the rope
most of my sim lesson was took by wo L
so when it comes to actual flying...wo A decides to "take care"
of me personally...
basically i was down thr praying..."PLEASE RAIN, GOD"
so my coursemates will sometimes comfort me...after seeing
being F until my soul is gone...
one point of time when i got myself very prepared...but still
end up my effort left unappreciated...i broke down finally
was damn touched one day when i flew the whole day until dinner was skipped
after we return to bunk...they actually ordered canadian pizza!
after we finally all passed, wo A gave us a course debrief
then he told me..."dey~ u know i wanna fail u tat time. but throughout
the period u shown me ur fighting spirit. u know wad is it?"
i was like, stunned. "i know, our saf core value" (the rest fall off their seat)
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been in and out of hospital when my Grandpa was critically illed
Doc says he was left the max, 2yrs
and i started hating NS for eating up my limited time
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P.S: sometimes i stared at ppl i knew some time ago until they finally can recognise me. tat's how much the change in me now.
reflected at 10:44:00 PM
